Thursday, January 17, 2013

The Shattered Dream - My CAT Story

I had a dream, or I must say - 'I have a dream', to go and study in one of the top B-schools of the country.
So like lakhs of other aspirants I decided to write the Common Admission Test (2012), commonly called CAT. That was the only door that could lead to the hallowed campuses of Indian Institutes of Management (IIMs).
During my course of preparation I learnt quite a few things. I gained a new insight.
Having come to Mumbai, the city of Dreams, where I had just joined my job, I wanted to turn my dream to reality.
So with all the intensity and focus I started my preparation.I also joined TIME so that my preparation does not dwindle away from the right course and I get important inputs in the form of study material, sectional tests etc. from TIME. The decision to join was just perfect and I felt very satisfied with the teachers and the methodology followed by them. I was more than satisfied with my preparation plan and its execution till then, which boosted my confidence even further.The dream to go to a premiere B-school was enough a reason to keep me driving and put in days of efforts (actually nights of efforts).
Come March and the workload at the office increased exponentially. My office required me to work also on weekends, against which I was entitled to take a compensatory off which though was very cumbersome owing to the fact that it was not very easily given.
Nevertheless I kept working hard in spite of many odds. I had joined the weekend classes at TIME so at times it was really difficult to manage office and classes simultaneously. I used to get frustrated sometimes but then I used to console myself back and gain my composure and start working again on my preparation.
During weekdays, the day and also partly the evening was consumed by the office. So I only had nights to study which though was not a very big issue because I'd been pre-dominantly nocturnal since my high school.
But to manage time, study till late in the night, then to wake up next morning and toil again in that dreaded office for hours was exhausting. It demanded a lot from me, a lot of perseverance and discipline perhaps.
But I carried on, working the hardest I could and hoping for the best to come.
And then what followed was a streak of mocks, in most of which I did fairly well, if not extra-ordinary.
I was expecting being paid handsomely for the hard work I had put in.
Then the C-day (I like calling it C-day instead of the D-day), I did okay as per me.Though I fumbled managing time but I was confident enough of a good score.
Shattered were my dreams, a paltry 96 percentile I got. I was dejected, all gloomy; and I was broken. I had no idea where to head now. I was not enjoying my job, I wanted to switch to management profile, I was not supported as much by the family to leave my job and sit back at home, and now all I had, to deal with, was a bad result.
But as they say, keep fighting until you win. Days after, I gained my composure, collected myself, ready to start all over again.This time with a new vigor, new hope and new lessons from the previous failure. I'll will nail it hard this time. I swear I'll !!!

Pseudonym : h!v

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